Two big end of the year distinctions that have been present in multiple conversations and swirling at the top of my brain are, “invitation vs. obligation” and “ritual vs. resolution.”

In the past, perhaps before March 2020, there were many things in our lives, including different aspects of work, which we may have felt obligated to do.  Obligations could have been with people, assignments, tasks, or our personal need to accomplish something; obligations which honestly, truly did not matter whether they were done or not.  Our obligations may have been obsessive habits we were unaware of, that caused us unnecessary feelings of stress, needing to rush, push, add excess, or belabor.  On the other hand, invitations include a choice to kindly participate or not, and invitations are typically felt as an opportunity for mutual benefit.  In the last few months I have done a lot of contemplating about these principles.  I have decided to turn obligations into invitations for both myself and others.  The paradigm shift feels like a giant exhale of relief.  I am committed to live what feels like a more fluid and present life in 2021.

Slowing down

One of my commitments to myself in this new year is to slow down.  Even though this pandemic has brought most things to a halt, I found myself continuing to rush.   I find I am often busy with one thing or another, which might also be an old habit, hard to break, and running from one thing to the next, whether it’s work, family, home, or somehow social.  One day I found myself rushing, in the shower for goodness sake, and had a massive epiphany that this is an old habit I no longer want to hold.  Rushing is not good for my health or well- being, and I vow to be kinder to myself this coming year.

Check In

My desire is to surrender more and go with the flow, and design rituals around this way of being.  To check in with myself before I start something…anything, to check in with my family and friends more often, because we all need more connection and nurturing now.  I want to hone my rituals before I begin something, work with a client, lead a Mastermind, in order to fully align myself, and be even more present than I was able to before.  I realize the power of my attention, and the power of my intention.  I realize my personal rituals have been a saving grace to me during these last nine months.  My meditation and fitness have become medication to my body and soul.  And without them on a daily basis I am lost.

Practicing Rituals

I’ve recently gotten into the use of a certain magical brand of essential oils.  Two different friends introduced them to me in the last four months. I took it as a sign that these would be of great assistance, and they have.  One oil that I put on my wrist several times a week is called “Joy.”  It literally is the scent of “Joy,” so throughout my busy day, as I get a whiff off my wrist, I remember “Joy. “The other scent I love is called “Inner Child,” as I remember to play and enjoy myself, because that’s what life is about.

So, as I wrap this last year tenderly in a bow, extract what was most meaningful for me, and send it off, I invite you, if you so choose, alongside me, to turn unconscious obligation into invitation and create nurturing rituals with yourself and your family around what matters most. May this next year be your most loving and meaningful yet.